Category: American

Melbourne 3000: Father’s Office Speakeasy Bar

The Father’s Office is located in the heart of the student precinct of the CBD, close to RMIT and next door to The State Library. Students and travellers seeking Melbourne’s hard to find happy hour congregate in the large balcony area at The Father’s Office. The bar is jumpin’ jumpin’ with people ordering $6.50 Absolute vodka’s and craft beers on tap. But the Father’s Office is also known on Instagram for it’s cute American style share plates and burgers.

You will find share plates from polenta and parmesan cubes to pork cracking and popcorn chicken on the menu, enough to excite anyone who hasn’t eaten before drinking at the bar.

After ordering on an empty stomach, we were presented with the Home-style mac and cheese, arancini balls and fries.

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Rustic creamy mac and cheese baked with breadcrumbs and topped with cheese (bacon optional) was well presented and tasty enough for $8, but the dish was not big enough for one person, never mind substantial enough to share.

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Three Arancini balls that sat in a sweet smoked aioli for $6 were delicious, but you might want to order 3 plates of these if you’re hungry. As for the fries, I have never seen such a small portion of fries served at a bar in my life. It was as if the chef of The Father’s Office took our order, walked down to McDonalds on Swanston Street, returned with a small fries and then poured them into a tea cup.

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I know you have potential Father’s Office, so please stop being so stingy.

Father's Office Speakeasy Bar and Restaurant on Urbanspoon

Footscray 3011: 8bit

You will often find me at the markets in Footscray purchasing avocados for 99 cents per kilo, at the medical centre getting health checks or dining at one of the many superb Vietnamese restaurants.

You won’t normally find me (or anyone in Footscray) at a burger joint. Until now.

This trendy diner has just recently opened at 8 Droop St, Footscray, and is attracting quite the crowd. I went on a Sunday night and just missed a line of 10-15 people that were waiting to order. Everyone in the diner were munching down on what appeared to be delicious juicy burgers that stand upright in small cardboard containers. The concept is genius, as I assume the juices will be caught by the cardboard box and not run down your top. I love the skilful way the owner has chosen to locate 8 Bit, in an area where western style eateries are scarce.

After witnessing how good the burgers appeared I attempted to order the crumbed portabello mushroom burger. Prior to this I overheard the cashier inform my friend that they were out of onion rings. As I pondered getting the burger, he told me they were out of mushrooms.

Disappointed by this information, I ordered some potato gems covered in hot cheese sauce and onions.

The topping was delicious, even though the potato gems were clearly a McCains frozen product.

I want to say I was satisfied, but I wasn’t. I was after a drink but the line at front of house was too long. I felt sorry for the one cashier. I was in awe that they ran out of onions and mushrooms as 8bit is located about 5 metres from Saigon fresh fruit and vegetable market. For goodness sake if the stock was running low during the day this could have been easily rectified.

I hope to return and try the mushroom burger soon. For now I leave you with some photos of potato gems.

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Potato Gems with Cheese Sauce, spring onion and onions

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Potato Gems & Ketchup

 

 

8bit. on Urbanspoon

Brunswick East 3057: B-East

After a long discussion about what type of cuisine we wanted to eat for our early dinner, a partner of my friend recommended B’East for American style burgers and fries.

B’east is a relatively new establishment, located in Brunswick East on Lygon St. B’east is open for lunch and dinner and as a bar at night, with trivia on a Tuesday.

Just prior to leaving I had been suffering from an incredibly painful toothache and had taken a panadene for it.

On the drive to B’east I was nauseous, struggling to get excited about the prospect of lunch. I was hungry though, and when we arrived I ordered the roast pumpkin and blue cheese sliders ($7) with a side of fries. The mini burgers came out on a the ever trendy chopping board, the buns gleaming up at me insisting I eat them. Flavoursome and light, the sliders were a hit for me, even though the bread was shiny and obviously very sugary.
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According to my acquaintance, ‘The Morrissey’ veggie burger also had a very shiny bun and was splendid.
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The thick cut fries on the side were battered and deliciously crispy and fresh.

I tried some of my acquaintances poutine, worried that she would think I was similar to a seagull. I could not stop stealing chips covering in delicious gravy and cheese.
Unfortunately when I returned home I was violently ill in my bathroom, but this way in no way associated with my meal at B’east.
I recommend b’east to people with a hangover, it is reasonably priced and the thick cut chips are superb.

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The B.East on Urbanspoon

Flemington 3031: McDonalds

Why did I go to Mcdonalds?

For these:

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But what I really got was:

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Enough said.

NO Not enough said. THESE ‘CHEESY’ SNACKS WERE DRY, TASTELESS AND WEIRD. WHERE IS THE MELTED CHEESE. I RECOMMEND THESE TO NO ONE.

McDonald's on Urbanspoon

Prahran 3181: Misty’s Diner

I went to Misty’s diner on Sunday night for something to do. I have been to this flamboyant American diner before, so my expectations were not high.

It was October, the decor was bright pink, and a clutter of Halloween decorations hung loosely from every nook and cranny in the room.
I could not sit comfortably in my seat as there was a giant plant that looked like a spider behind me.

I took a look at the assortment of menus on the table. There was a cocktail menu, a specials menu stuck on the wall, another specials menu stuck to the napkin holder and a mishmash of 3 menus within the one main menu. I was confused and became glassy-eyed, suffering from cloudy-brain within minutes of sitting down.

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I had a ‘Sex on Miami beach’ with gin to drink. I don’t think this cocktail in a thick, cheap water glass with a wonky floating umbrella can be compared to sex on such a notoriously beautiful beach.

I made the abrupt decision to order the Bleu cheese and Cajun Burger. I had to go up to the counter to order, I told the lady 3 times I wanted the vegetarian patty (all hot dogs and burgers can be made vegetarian).

As I expected, the waitress served me the meat burger, I had to send it back. After my friends had all finished eating and I got what I had actually ordered, this is what arrived:

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I feel bad that you even had to look at that pathetic, grotesque burger.

The white bread role had enough bleach in it, I’m sure my stomach lining turned white. The veggie patty was pretty much just bubble and squeak from a freezer.

I had the honor of tasting the ‘Chilli Fries (made vegetarian)’, albeit tasty the fries were soggy as they were used as a dumping ground for a splat of onion, Mexican cheese, salsa and re fried bean slop.

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There was one positive, the loud atmosphere was fun (even though normally I loathe loud noises) and the fun and colourful owner Misty was there. Misty’s presence seemed to keep the diner’s happy.

Overall, I guess Misty’s diner is a fun place to eat, but the vegetarian options are horrible, the fries were sloppy and the drink came in an unsightly glass.

I still have stomach cramps and it is Monday lunch time.

Misty's Diner on Urbanspoon

Brunswick 3056: Gasometer

Southern fried chicken burger and fries – A place you would come to only if your friends band is playing and you wanted to eat unhealthy fried American diner food. The vegan options are great to have on a menu but there should be a burger (or something) without a large chunk of processed soy. A portobello mushroom burger with optional onion rings, Seasoned onion rings with good spices or creole chicken with a flatter and thinner soy burger would be great. The white sugary buns need to be replaced ASAP with something more grainy and healthy. It’s all well and good to serve sugary white bread rolls because it’s an American diner style menu but it’s 2013 and customers want healthier options.
The mac and cheese used to be fantastic when it was in smaller servings and came as a side. It’s brilliant to have mac and cheese on the menu so I hope it stays but improves in flavour.
In general gasometer food needs more seasoning, less soy , fresher options, better quality and healthier bread and to keep mac and cheese on the menu forever.

Gasometer on Urbanspoon

Carlton 3053: The Beaufort

The Beaufort was a dark and dingy place but with friendly staff and a memorable American diner burger.
When I say ‘dingy’ I don’t mean there was a dim romantic light filling the room, I mean I couldn’t even read the menu because it was so dark. I had to use the candle on my table and my iphone to read the menu. Also there was a terrible smell of beer and sweat inside. Apart from the tacky decor, bad smell and darkness, I did like was the friendliness of the staff. It was evident that the waiter was the only waiter on for the night and he was working hard. When my portobello mushroom burger came out I was pleasantly surprised! Even though I couldn’t see it. The burger was flavoursome, the sauce was brilliant and the spiced onion rings delicious- I would like to see these on the menu alone! The use of a higer quality bread rolls (not white for a start) would make me come back for another burger. Just because it’s an American diner doesn’t mean the bread has to be white and sugary, it’s 2013 and we want more nutritous bread. On a brighter note, the thick cut potato chips with skin left on were delicious! I wouldn’t be surprised if this was a secret herb and spice mix that was locked in a vault on two sides of the world and only the CEO of The Beaufort Hotel had the key. I might go back to the Beaufort if I’m feeling rather dim and ready to take on a sugary white bun.

The Beaufort on Urbanspoon

Honolulu, HI 96815: California Pizza Kitchen

The first time I went here with one friend for lunch and ordered the quinoa salad it was fantastic. The second time I came with a group of six for dinner and it was a nightmare. It was too busy and the food was bland. They forgot my sauteed mushrooms on my creamy pasta and after I ate it I started vomiting 1 hour later. Not sure if it was from this place, but wouldn’t go back and eat creamy pasta that’s for sure. Also the staff thought there was dairy in their hummus. Which after a long investigation we found there wasn’t. There is never dairy in hummus. So not impressed with food knowledge or service. Too busy. If you do go get the quinoa salad at lunch time and sit on the balcony; it was fresh healthy.

California Pizza Kitchen on Urbanspoon

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Waikiki 6169: Lulu’s

I stayed at the Hyatt Place around the corner from Lulu’s so it was easily accessible from the hotel & overlooks the beach.
I had the ‘Maui Waui’ shrimp salad twice which was pretty fresh! Came with a shrimp kebab and lots if mixed greens, feta and avocado! Could do with more fresh tomatoes but was pretty healthy and fresh. I also ordered the veggie quesadilla and was happy with that. (See photo) just order less cheese and more fresh tomato and avoid becoming obsese cause damn do they love orange ‘jack’ cheese in the US! I would suggest sharing a salad or meal here because they are generous servings.
Some cons are I saw some of the meals my friends had and didn’t like the look of the sugary bread buns they use. Ordered some fries and they are pretty average too.
Cocktails are literally $5. I highly recommend the lava flow. I highly do not recommend the Mai Thai as the free pour in HI can be really troublesome to your stomach lining the next day!
The atmosphere is great and it probably has the best views of Waikiki beach for price.
In summary: ok food depending on what you order, healthy options, generous servings, fantastic view, great service, could do with some healthier bread options and i think they should add a new menu item- the volcano fries covered in gravy and topped with cheese! Yum!

Lulu's Waikiki on Urbanspoon

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